Package Thief vs. Glitter Bomb Trap

More Than A Feeling

Kitty v Smelly Socks

RoboTrump

Lego Captain America 3

Follow-up to Lego Captain America 2.

Jerry's Doom

Zombie Sneak Attacks

Every zombie sneak attack in The Walking Dead reminds me of this scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

Clinton vs. Trump

Holy Kang vs. Kodos!

Enemies of the State

What Battlestar Galactica Can Teach Us About the Militarization of Police

Lego Captain America 2

Follow-up to the hilariously violent Lego Captain America.

Godzilla vs. Godzilla

Based on tomatometer ratings I'm clearly in the minority, but I thought the much maligned 1998 Godzilla movie was better than the 2014 version. Movies involving giant monsters or robots are easier to swallow if they don’t take themselves too seriously. Unfortunately Godzilla 2014, unlike the 1998 version, takes itself way too seriously. It’s a completely humorless film.

It’s certainly much closer than Godzilla 1998 to the movies I watched as a kid. I still remember those badly dubbed Japanese films nostalgically, but come on, men dressed in rubber monster suits fighting each other while destroying a miniature set of a city isn’t exactly the basis for high drama.

And how do you make a Godzilla movie without any Godzilla? Seriously, there’s like a minute of screen time when you can clearly see him. Here’s a scene of Godzilla on a moonless night. Here’s a scene of Godzilla in the debris cloud from a collapsed building. Here’s a scene of Godzilla’s back as he’s swimming.

On the other hand, no atomic breath? You’ve got to be kidding me Godzilla 1998.

“Fairest of Them All” Fan Film

“Mirror, Mirror” is one of my favorite episodes from the original series. Seriously, who doesn’t love a goateed evil twin, whether it's Spock or Eric Cartman?

Crossing the Time Stream

Crossing the time stream occurs in episodic storytelling when a plot device is introduced that should have far-reaching implications, but is not routinely used after its introduction, even in situations where it would be an ideal solution for the problems faced by the heroes or villains. The most common example is time travel that allows the past to be changed and there is no more egregious crosser of the time stream than Star Trek.

The time stream was first crossed in the original series, but it wasn't until the subsequent movie and TV series that its frequent use snowballed into huge continuity issues. Star Trek II, III, and IV illustrate the problems caused by crossing the time stream. In The Wrath of Khan, Spock and numerous other crew members of the Enterprise and Reliant are killed. In The Search for Spock, Kirk steals the enterprise and in the ensuing adventure Spock is resurrected, but Kirk’s son is murdered and the Enterprise destroyed. In The Voyage Home, Kirk and crew travel back in time using their captured Klingon warbird in order to retrieve whales to save Earth’s future.

Wait, what? You can travel back in time to solve problems?

Uhmm, OK. Hey Kirk, how about this plan? After you’ve kill Khan in the present, why not just travel back in time and kill him in the past instead. Show up the day after you marooned him on Ceti Alpha V and launch a photon torpedo at him from orbit. Khan’s wrath will be incinerated with thermonuclear fury and since no one from Star Fleet has bothered to check on him for the last fifteen years, there's minimal impact to the timeline.

Spock doesn't have to die; your son doesn't have to die; your crew members don't have to die; the Enterprise doesn't have to be destroyed; and you can avoid a court martial for stealing a starship.

Let’s assume, however, that there’s a Federation Temporal Prime Directive and Kirk is only willing to violate it if the Earth is about to be destroyed by an alien space probe that communicates using catastrophic power-draining planetary weather changes and/or whalesong.

That would fill one plot hole, but there’s an adage that says “when time travel is outlawed, only outlaws will use time travel.” In other words, if the Federation has qualms about changing the timeline, most of its enemies would not.

Take the Borg for example. In First Contact they traveled back in time to assimilate Earth and almost succeeded, but that pesky Picard followed them through their temporal vortex and thwarted their plans. If only they could learn to adapt, they’d try it again and travel back in time somewhere the Federation fleet couldn’t observe them before heading toward Earth.

And surely after discovering the secret to time travel, at least one clever Klingon, Romulan, or Cardassian would come to the realization that if you travel back far enough in time, you can easily defeat your enemies with a starship. If there’s one thing that I learned from the Star Trek reboot, it’s that a U.S deep sea drilling platform sent back in time could have defeated the entire British navy in the War of 1812.

There are numerous other examples in the long history of Star Trek where crossing the time stream involves something other than time travel. How It Should Have Ended lampooned the use of transwarp beaming and magic blood in the most recent movie, Star Trek Into Darkness:



I thoroughly enjoyed the movie, but after 35 years of watching Star Trek I suppose I’ve been conditioned to accept that its depiction of technology in the science fiction genre follows fewer coherent and consistent rules than the depiction of magic in a typical series from the fantasy genre.

It really is a lost opportunity. When the franchise was rebooted, the creative team could have cast aside decades of continuity baggage. Instead they crossed the time stream right from the start to live on the side where nothing makes sense if you think about it.

Playing the Nazi Card

There was a political group handing out literature by the post office when I picked up my mail the other week. They used these signs to attract attention:



I was reminded of Lewis Black’s thoughtful rant on Nazi Tourette’s:


When I’m Earth Overlord, my subjects will be free to criticize my enlightened rule without fear of reprisal.

The only exception will be for those who compare me or my governance to Hitler and the Nazis. Those people and anyone even remotely related to them will just disappear.

Now that’s something the Nazis would do, but the Volk will have to be content referring to such acts as evil.

At least there won’t be idiots loitering outside the post office.

Kitty’s Last Bath

Humans were harmed in the making of this video.

Pity Me Kitty

I haven‘t eaten in almost four hours.

Lego Captain America

Awesome!

Slug Execution

The penalty for entering the forbidden zone of the cat's food dish: death by salting!

The Walls Came Down

Microsoft CEO to retire within the next 12 months:

Microsoft Corp. today announced that Chief Executive Officer Steve Ballmer has decided to retire as CEO within the next 12 months, upon the completion of a process to choose his successor. In the meantime, Ballmer will continue as CEO and will lead Microsoft through the next steps of its transformation to a devices and services company that empowers people for the activities they value most. 

Coincidental timing or the inability to recognize and respond to disruptive innovation?



The Walls Came Down by The Call:

They stood there laughing
They’re not laughing anymore
The walls came down